Some dogs have very particular needs when it comes to getting their separation under control. In my How to Begin Separation Anxiety Training blog, Step #1 is suspend absences - never leave your dog alone longer than they can handle (even if that is seconds) in order to both manage the behaviors they have been practicing and help them feel safe and trusting while we work at their pace. I also mention that this does not have to be you 24/7 - friends, neighbors, daycare, and sitters can be invaluable!

But how do you suspend absences with a dog who does not like new people or other dogs?

Usually this means that you are also beginning your training by building your dog’s inner circle of trusted folks. It is easiest to start with someone you know who is willing to be patient, follow your training rules, and watch your pup when you need to leave the house. However, sometimes a trusted dog walker/sitter can also work if they are willing to be paid for time to come for training sessions with you.

If your dog has INTENSE reactions or any bite history, I highly recommend getting in touch with a certified positive reinforcement trainer to help you interpret your dog’s body language and learn a training plan made just for your dog before trying these. Feel welcome to check out our Virtual Private Sessions for just such a purpose.

Meet away from the home in a space that is not too distracting or overwhelming for your dog. Sometimes renting a Sniffspot is perfect! If going too far away does not work, a backyard or a quiet area around your street.

Once there go slow and at your dog’s pace. This may mean that the other person sits in chair or stands facing away very neutral or walks parallel with you about 8-10 feet away and does not even talk to you or your dog at first. Play with toys or treats while the new person is neutral. If the dog chooses to go closer to the person - treats and praise! If instead we got too close and there is barking or other reactions - build distance and potentially get out of view. Try again at a bigger distance or call it a day and make a new game plan for next time.

Over time, at your dog’s pace, start incorporating new person into the games you have been playing. Make it fun and if there are whale eyes or other signs of discomfort they can get neutral again. Over time, move the games into the home space.

Here are some of my favorite activities and games to play to start building a positive relationship with a new person in a dog’s life:

Treat Toss AKA Left/Right Pattern Game

Toss a Ball

Sniffari (either scatter treats in the grass for nature’s snuffle mat or hide treats in specific spots)

Tricks (sit, touch, bow, roll over- choose your pet’s favorites!)

Go for a Hike on a quiet, private path

Repeat, repeat, repeat until your dog either ENJOYS being around this person, or is at minimum neutral with them and comfortable with them in the home space.

Give yourself some grace while you are at it! It can be challenging and sometimes isolating to have a dog with multiple issues - but it really is possible to help you and your dog feel better and live life the way you all want to.